An Explanation of Absence
3/25/2012 12:07:41 AM
It is with the deepest sadness and a daughter’s love that I write this post.
On Wednesday, March 21st 2012, I witnessed an act of great courage.
Whilst in hospital, following an operation to replace an elbow joint, a series of unexpected and tragic events propelled my mother to a place from which she knew she could not return and she made the brave decision to call an end to her treatment.
The wonderful lady who passed on to me a love of books and an appreciation for the written word, left this world, with grace and dignity.
There are many things I would like to write, but Mum was a woman who treasured her privacy.
If you ask me how old she was, I will say not old enough.
If you ask if she was frightened, I will tell you she had no fear.
If you ask if it was a shock, I will nod, but say she knew it was her time.
She was a tiny woman with a huge capacity for compassion.
And even with her failing heart, she loved unconditionally.
She was my counsel, my keeper of secrets and my friend.
She was my mum.
And I loved her.
Laura x
Comments:
Bluestockingmum:
3/26/2012 3:48:48 PM
Ahhh, a Mother’s love…
Dear Laura
I echo what everyone’s written here. And what a wonderful tribute to your wonderful mum.
I was right; you are a chip off the old block! How alike you both sound. You were blessed to have each other, I’m sure, and she will have admired her brave, beautiful daughter equally.
You know at times like these, we sometimes fail to see when someone dies, it isn’t the end. Your mum lives on in you; the values she instilled, the loves she shared, and your indomitable spirit that she nurtured – THIS will be her legacy, and your mum will live on as you teach those values and strengths to your own children…
Keep writing, expressing yourself as you do with such heart and depth and I bet you anything your mum will be watching over you, marvelling at her wonderful daughter and willing you to find the success you deserve.
Whatever happens in your life from this point forward, Laura, know you were always loved and you truly loved your lovely mum.
Nothing and no-one will ever take away and I bet she’s right there, sitting on your shoulder, watching over you and her grand children forever.
xxx
When I read this, Debbie, I cried all over again, but what wise and comforting words. Thank you. I’m waiting for the little white feather… xx
Jennie Bohnet:
3/26/2012 3:08:24 PM
Mother Love.
So sorry to hear about your loss. You’ve written a wonderful tribute to your mum. Look after yourself at this sad and difficult time.
Thank you, Jennie. It’s been an odd couple of weeks – very up and down, but I am grateful I had the opportunity to share good news with her before she became ill. x
Anita Chapman:
3/26/2012 11:02:58 AM
Your mum.
Laura, I’m so sorry to hear of the loss of your mum. Your post is so beautifully written and such a wonderful tribute to her. I know how difficult it is to lose a mother and my thoughts are with you. Lots of love, Anita X
Thank you, Anita. I’ve been blessed for forty five years. We were very close and I shall miss her. I can’t see that changing. xx
Phillipa Ashley:
3/26/2012 9:13:28 AM
Your Mum.
Laura, I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved mum. You must have given her a lot of happiness and joy.
That’s a very kind thing to say, Phillipa. Thank you. x
Sue Moorcoft:
3/26/2012 7:54:29 AM
You and your mum.
Much love, Laura. Losing someone you love is so hard. xxx
Thank you for your support, Sue. xx
Lyn (ManicScribbler@blogspot.co.uk):
3/25/2012 6:19:54 PM
Mothers.
Oh my gosh, Laura, I can barely see the screen, my eyes are so misted up. My heartfelt condolences to you. I do understand your loss, having gone through this pain myself.
But you have acknowledged the legacy your mother left you and which will always live on in you. Already – and so soon – you’ve managed to use that to inspire others. You are your mother’s daughter, and there’s not a single doubt that her frail heart would be bursting with pride for you. Keep writing. For her. Keep making her proud.
Lyn
Lyn, it’s very kind of you to take the time to visit, read and leave such a sincere message. It gives me strength. Thank you.
Stephanie Keyes:
3/25/2012 2:37:02 PM
Thinking Of You.
Laura,
I am so sorry that you have to go through this. I lost my dad in May after a six year battle with cancer, so I know it’s never easy to lose someone we love. However, I do know this. They watch over us and keep us safe. She will always be with you. 🙂
I’m sorry to hear about your dad; I imagine it is still very raw for you. We are approaching the seventh anniversary of the loss of my lovely step-dad. Cancer took him in just over a year. When Mum went, I realised I wasn’t a proper grown-up, despite being married with children, and having a house and a job. I relied on her advice and experience to guide me through tough times. On Thursday, I grew up. xxx
Wendy Standley:
3/25/2012 12:44:54 PM
Your Mum.
I am so sorry to hear your news. I have tears in my eyes whilst reading. You wrote such lovely words. Thinking of you and your family. xxx
That’s very kind, Wendy. Our lives are changing. Things around here will be very different. xx
Debs Carr:
3/25/2012 12:25:34 PM
Your Loss.
Your beautiful tribute made me cry. Your mother sounds so strong and much loved.
I’m so sorry for your loss.x
Thank you, Debs. xx
Ellie James:
3/25/2012 12:07:41 PM
Absence.
I was crying all of Wednesday night after arriving home from a friends but I feel alright right now, it comes in waves of emotions. Sometimes I will cry myself to sleep other nights I fall asleep naturally.
Love you Mum Xxx
We have each other, Ellie. Your Gran was extremely proud of you and your brother, as your dad and I are. It will hurt, but we’ll keep talking and remembering and as a family we shall get through. Love you, Number 1 xxx
EmmaPass:
3/25/2012 9:55:36 AM
Absence.
Laura, I’m so sorry. Thank you for sharing such a wonderful tribute – your mum sounds like a truly amazing lady. Sending you loads of hugs. Xxx
Thank you, Emma. Mum was pretty cool. xx
Jane Risdon:
3/25/2012 8:07:26 AM
A Daughter’s Love.
Laura, so moving and so uplifting too. My condolences on your Mother’s passing and my admiration for your demeanor and obvious love for her.
Thank you. x
Rebecca:
3/25/2012 6:29:49 AM
Your mum.
I cried reading your beautiful tribute to your mother. So moving.
And in response to your reply to Effie – you already are, dear heart, you already are.
Much love and hugs to you at this very sad time. Take care.
R xxx
You have a kind soul, Rebecca. Thank you. xxx
Kyla:
3/25/2012 5:04:42 AM
Love.
Laura, I wish I could write something profound that would make things easier but I can’t, but I do know your loss and I do know that your Mum must have been increadibly proud of you and that there is no doubt that her last days were the best they could have been in the circumstances because of you and your love, much love and respect xxxxx
Thank you, Kyla. xxx
Jen Fishler:
3/25/2012 3:38:25 AM
Your Mom. Mine.
I am weeping. I don’t even know you, but I am weeping.
I am also sitting beside my mom’s bed, in my guestroom.
She has congenital heart failure. Some days, like today,
she is so weak, this tiny little woman…but she gives
me so much…
I have brought her to live with me.
I am treasuring this time.
And I sincerely wish I could give you a hug.
Jen
Hi Jen. Thank you for taking the time to comment and for your kind sentiments. I was my mother’s carer for nearly seven years and I do not regret a single moment we spent together, even those times when we disagreed about something.
Enjoy your time together. Have no regrets.
Celia Anderson:
3/25/2012 2:50:00 AM
Beloved Mum.
Woke up in the middle of the night and just wondered how you were, Laura. So glad you could write this; it’s a fantastic tribute. I know your mum must have already been proud of you for all sorts of things, but one day she’ll be even prouder, in whatever lovely place she’s now resting. You have a great future as a writer.
Much love
Celia xxx
Celia – you’re very kind and your heart is as big as a mountain. Bigger. Much love to you. xx
effiemerryl@btinternet.com:
3/25/2012 12:22:44 AM
Absence.
Oh Laura. I am so sorry for your loss. You have my deepest sympathy and great feelings of friendship. I know that sudden loss and it’s horrible but your post is a lovely tribute to your mum.
Take care, remember her, be kind to yourself.
XX
Thank you, Effie. I hope I can conduct myself with the same grace and dignity as Mum. xx